Boys don’t cry, but the girls who played with them? We don’t flinch.
I broke my arm playing basketball, broke it again hopping a fence, fractured it playing baseball, and I’ve sprained it a few times as well.
My mother loves the basketball story the most. She’ll tell you she was in the middle of a church meeting when I walked in holding my arm and without a tear said:
“I broke my arm. We have to go to the hospital.”
Growing up I would shrug and tell you it didn’t really hurt. A few years ago I might have told you I don’t remember, but those aren’t quite true.
It hurt like hell and I remember it clearly. I remember the sound when the bone snapped right outside the paint as I came down from a jump shot. The sound seemed to echo because we were alone in the gym. And it felt like my arm was burning from the inside out.
All I wanted to do was cry like a baby and scream at the same time, but I wouldn’t.
Because crying was for girls, and girls don’t play basketball.
Hopping the fence? Same deal. After a few curses, my friends and I walked back to the baseball fields where our parents were watching our older brothers play Little League without a single tear.
Because crying was for girls.
The Bulls' trinity in the 90s . LAPRESSE
I understand what it’s like to live and pursue a world that was not made for you. Do you know who else knew what that was like? Michael Jordan, Dennis Rodman and Scottie Pippen.
They’re one of the NBA greatest trio’s of all time (Man could those guys move!) And have you seen Dennis Rodman? He was a black man wearing his hair different colors on NATIONAL TELEVISION. But Rodman could do what he wanted because of a very simple rule:
Ball don’t lie.
It was no surprise when university, business, and most spaces and business industries were not made for me to play. But the older I got the more I saw women, people of color, and underdogs stepping into places not made for them so I was less alone.
But eventually I realized I was playing by the same rules, just in different playground.
Women in business don’t cry.
Or wear leggings every day.
Or reference Star Wars in business meetings.
And if they’re not fifteen minutes early, they are late.
In fact, they’re probably late because of childcare which makes them unreliable.
And it was exhausting.
Kate Carnahan, wears leggings every day.
So I did something insane and started my own business where it’s okay to wear leggings every day, reference Star Wars just as often, and if you’re late because of childcare I am so happy to wait or reschedule - what works best for you?
Not only that, we’ve expanded and grown to a community of 50+ members who are right there in the game with me. Because at the end of the day there’s one simple rule that hasn’t stopped these women and men.
And this rule simple will keep so many more women, men, and underdogs
playing a game not meant for them:
Ball don’t lie.
Photo taken of the Women’s Leadership Network at The Studio Downtown by Yennifer Lopez
